LOVE HURTS (2025) – Review

February has finally arrived, the month of romance with that big holiday for sweethearts almost “smack dab” in the middle. And naturally, the Hollywood studios are certainly ready to cater to the big occasion, perhaps making a trip to the cinema a fitting finale to an evening of bubbly, flowers, and swanky dinners. Now this year they’re not content to merely release a “swoony” romance or even a riotous “rom-com”. No, moviemakers are mixing things up with the two big releases this weekend. One adds elements of horror flicks and thrillers in HEART EYES. In another section of the multiplex is this “high-concept hybrid” which sprinkles in some “mushy stuff’ with a a fast and frenetic action crime thriller. And with all the roundhouse kicks and furious fists, it’s clear, and not an understatement, that LOVE HURTS.

The opening scene of the story takes us to suburban Milwaukee, where a lovely dark-haired woman exits a bus, whips out a big marker, and quickly vandalizes an ad on the bus stop bench. Getting the black ink embellishments is the image of the top salesman for Frontier Reality, Marvin Gable (Ke Huy Quan). Back at his own modest home, he whips up some Valentine’s cookies to dole out at an open house in a fairly new subdivision. He’s a bit annoyed by one of his defaced signs, but carries on, extolling the house to several possible buyers. A bit later he heads back to headquarters and checks in with his bored assistant Ashley (Lio Tipton). Ducking into his office, Marv is punched by someone in the shadows. When he comes to, Marvis is surprised to see an old “frenemy” the poetic knife-wielding assassin known as “The Raven” (Mustafa Shakir). Turns out that Marv was a former “enforcer” for a criminal gang run by his own brother, “Knuckles’ (Daniel Wu), who now believes that a former accountant named Rose, who embezzled several million dollars from him, is still alive. Since Marv was supposed to have eliminated her years ago, Raven wants Marv to reveal Rose’s hiding place. The surprised Marv gets the upper hand, dashes away to a model home, and is beset by two goons, Otis (Andre Eriksen) and King (Marshawn Lynch), sent by Knuckles’s new “right-hand man”, Merlo (Cam Gigandet). This new battle is soon halted by the arrival of the “lady in question”, the “back from the dead” Rose (Ariana DeBose). So, just why did Marv spare her life (the holiday is a big hint)? And can the duo, despite Marv’s “new persona” survive the henchman hordes dispatched by the enraged Knuckles? Could this be a new “Valentine’s Day massacre” for the 21st century?

In his first feature film outing (and first lead role) since his Oscar win for EVERYTHING EVERYWHERE ALL AT ONCE, Quan is a delirious delight as the sweet, “mild-mannered” realtor who transforms into a whirling dervish of destruction. His mix of expert comic timing and physical prowess. much as with Jackie Chan and even going back to the silent clowns, Chaplin, Keaton, and Lloyd, make his milquetoast Marv a most unlikely action hero. Quan somehow balances his furious fighting with a kind and gentle demeanor that earned him so many fans during that 2023 awards season. Speaking of trophies, the actress who handed him the gold (a year after she received her own), DeBose makes Rose an enigmatic but playful femme fatale, as she draws the audience to her, perhaps to ponder and solve the mystery of this “lady on the run”. Her ultimate pairing with Quan is worth the wait as DeBose becomes his guide and coach, inspiring Marv to be his “true self”. But it takes their combined skills to confront the revenge squads sent out by Knuckles played with a banal, casual cruelty by the unpredictable Wu. Tipton excels as the emotionally numb Ashley (a spin on Aubrey Plaza in TV’s “Parks and Recreations”), earning laughs and pathos when the brooding killer poet played with dark intensity by Shakir ignites a spark of passion buried deep within her. There’s also comic chaos generated by the other main baddies, Gigandet, Eriksen, and the rampaging “human bulldozer” King played with good humor by former pro footballer Lynch. But the biggest comic support can be found in the smaller supporting roles of the captured crooked “bean-counter” given lots of manic energy, though he’s mainly taped into a chair by the the superb Rhys Darby, and the simple, but warm-hearted “good ole’ boy” boss of Marv played by Quan’s GOONIES pal Sean Astin, a nice guy scooped up in this underworld war.

And speaking of firsts, this is the first directing job for stunt coordinator Jonathan Eusebio, Perhaps this cemented a “simpatico” bond with his leading man since Quan was himself a “fall guy” for many years. And this accounts for the very creative fight sequences, full of energy and great wit, as Marv tries to quickly assess the situation and use all manner of nearby household items for defense and attack (staplers can inflict pain and block lots of deadly blades). Eusebio has a good visual eye, especially in an early variation of the montage, as prospective clients change as Marv strolls from room to room in the model house. The location work is also tops with Manitoba subbing very well for Milwaukee. Plus he expertly guides the cast as the script goes from slapstick romp to deadly sibling showdown. The biggest problem may be with the abundance of stunt scenes as they feel like “plate-spinning” as the story nears the big reveals and the finale. Thankfully the filmmakers probably realized this since the flick clocks in under ninety minutes (no need for a BRUTALIST intermission). Action fans will get their needed “fix” without feeling as though they’ve taken too many rapid kicks to the noggin. As I mentioned earlier, the pairing of Quan and DeBose makes an inspired couple of pain-relievers to ease the sting and aches when LOVE HURTS.

2.5 Out of 4

LOVE HURTS is now playing in theatres everywhere