ANNETTE – Review

This weekend sees the release of a “follow-up” film to a delightful documentary I had the pleasure of reviewing about two months ago. Yes, you read that right. This can be called a “follow-up” rather than a sequel or even a “spin-off”. The previous feature doc in question was the adoring film “fan letter” from Edgar Wright all about the fifty-year-plus musical partnership of the Mael brothers, Ron and Russell, the duo behind the rock and roll band known as Sparks (that doc’s title was the fittingly-named THE SPARKS BROTHERS). The early part of that film told of the brothers’ love of film, as they delved into the “New Wave” classics of the 60s while in college, and made some “cinema” themselves. After their music success, they hoped to branch into the movies with proposed collaborations with (most famously) Jacques Tati and Tim Burton. To the Maels’ consternation, none of them materialized, and aside from their many music videos that were in near-constant rotation on MTV (yes, they ran music videos), their only feature film work was as themselves playing at an amusement park in the 70s Sensurround “potboiler” ROLLERCOASTER. But there was hope as the doc’s last minutes told of a movie musical that was going forward (they did both the songs and script). And here it is finally. That long-in-the-works Sparks-created flick is simply called ANNETTE.

Fittingly one of the first images we see is Ron and Russell in a recording studio as they lead the film’s opening song, which has the main characters and several minor ones singing and walking down the neon-lit nighttime streets of LA. They soon split up as the story unfolds. And, at its beginning, it’s a love story between two unlikely loves at the near-opposite ends of the entertainment industry. Ann (Marion Cotillard) is a celebrated operatic soprano, selling out orchestra halls and classical music venues all over the planet. Henry (Adam Driver) is a performance artist/stand-up comic, whose one-man show “The Ape of God” has a fervent following that packs the theatres nearly every night. And after he finishes his angry, often sick and twisted, rants he hops on his motorcycle and scoops up Ann, whisking her away from her “stage door” admirers, much to the delight of the “paparazzi and theTV show biz reports. Their passion leads to a secret wedding, and later to a daughter, Annette. But then things change, professionally at first. As Ann’s star continues to rise, Henry’s career begins a fast descent, as his fans reject his darker, more intimate screeds. A restorative vacation at sea ends in tragedy, which somehow inspires an unexpected, miraculous change in Annette. Could his daughter somehow inspire a new chapter in Henry’s life, or will Ann’s former accompanist, now an orchestra conductor (Simon Helberg) derail Henry’s plans for himself and his “uniquely gifted” baby girl?

Driver dominates this musical drama experiment as the glowering, mostly anti-social, angry all-the-time Henry, only managing a semi-smile when he’s around Ann or his infant. Luckily he possesses a strong singing voice, which helps in advancing the tale somewhat. And though he’s clearily a parody of the stadium-filling 1990s misogynistic mega-stars, his Henry never really commands the stage despite his turning his microphone into a nose-smashing bolo, Cotillard is a more serene, calming presence as Ana, though her singing voice doesn’t quite fill the cavernous venues we see her work, and often a considerable distance from the audience. And while she conveys well Ann’s explosion of erotic ecstasy, we can’t quite buy them as a domestic couple, as Henry looms over Ann at every other moment. Helberg lightens things up a bit as the never-named “conductor” (which Henry calls him in a song as “my conductor friend”), especially in his big solo number. As he details his unfulfilled passion for Ann, he tells us “Excuse me for a moment” as he whips a full orchestra (and a chorus) into a rousing crescendo.

Oh my, where to start. Yes, that opening group number is catchy, but the rest of the songs just evaporate as they drift past our ears. Now there are stretches of spoken dialogue, but the singing drops in at the oddest times, almost to the point of camp. Henry can warble a melody as he…well…performs his “husbandly duties” in one of many achingly awkward sex scenes. Ah, but Ann gets equal time as she tosses off a tune while smoking and “takin’ care a’ bizness'” while on the “throne”. Oh, about the smoking…yecch! Driver’s Henry puffs away while shadow-boxing and eating a banana (!) in prep for his concerts (he really chain-smokes through the whole darn thing). And when he does make his stage entrance he sputters and hacks as he complains about the cloud of stage smoke (ala solo singers) he walks through. And who knows why he tosses off the chorus of Tom Lehrer’s “National Brotherhood Week” (now there’s a classic song), much to the delight of his lemming-like fans, who along with a quartet of lady singers (a comic has backup singers) form a massive “Greek chorus”. This is one of many bizarre choices of director Leos Carax. A scene at sea has a rear projection backdrop that would be more at home in a 50s “B” picture. But I’m skirting around the “elephant in the room”, namely the title character of Annette. Though she’s hidden in the trailer, other media news outlets have let the “secret” out. It is a puppet, or to be more precise a marionette, one that looks to have hopped (or skittishly glided) out of an early 70s Gerry Anderson kids sci-fi show. When I came to the realization, I was stunned (I can imagine movie audiences with their mouths agape similar to the reaction to “Springtime for Hitler” in the 1967 THE PRODUCERS). A friend explained to me how a doll or puppet is a staple of stage operas. Well, this is a movie and it couldn’t be more distracting. Whew, glad I vented. But this is representative of the stilted script from the Maels brothers that combines elements of so many basic cable TV “marriage misery” films with, not joking here, the theme of the Chuck Jones Looney Tunes classic “One Froggy Evening” (sorry Mr. Jones and Michigan J.) This is pretentious “artsy-schmartzy” drek that aspires to be a scathing commentary on the times. I just hope that theatre owners make sure that their now spartan staff have plenty of “return” screening passes for patrons who can’t make it through all 140 excruciating minutes (it would be barely tolerable as an extended music video or an experimental short), I think the “Sparks brothers’ are talented music-makers, but…maybe Tati and Burton really wisely listened to their instincts. At least I can say that the scenes of LA at night, as Henry races down the Sunset Strip, are well done. But as for the drivel around those scenes, well, somebody please toss a net over ANNETTE (let me at least delight in a pun)! Hey Geppetto, come get yer’ kid!

One-Half Out of 4

ANNETTE is now playing in select theatres