WILD MOUNTAIN THYME – Review

Somewhere in the long list of what we can’t do during the last holidays of 2020 is spending that week or so break traveling and exploring. Perhaps the best option is vacationing virtually via our local cinema (or streaming service). How about heading to the “old country”? No, it’s not that old country, the setting of this holiday. Instead think about the holiday just a few months away: St. Patrick’s Day. This weekend’s new release is an ode to the “Emerald Isle”, although its time frame allows more rain than snow to cover those verdant green fields. It’s setting isn’t Christmas time, but rather WILD MOUNTAIN THYME.

At its beginning, we actually go back in time to the earlier days of neighboring farm families the Reillys and the Muldoons. Patriarch Tony (Christopher Walken) Reilly’s pride and joy is his only son, ten-year-old Anthony. Ah, but the lad is also adored by little Rosemary Muldoon, despite the efforts of her older sister Fiona. The story springs ahead to the present as the all-grown-up Anthony (Jamie Dornan) now pretty much runs the farm for widowed papa Tony. Things are now complicated by two gates that separate the Reilly farm from a thin segment now owned by the Muldoons. Papa Muldoon has just passed, but neither his widow Aoife (Dearbhla Molloy) nor the also adult Rosemary (Emily Blunt) is interested in selling. But she’s still interested in him, though Anthony never acts on the mutual attraction, now that Fiona moved away started her own family. And after Aoife’s passing, Rosemary now runs that farm. Her demise prompts Tony to make a momentous decision: since Anthony won’t “settle down”, he’ll offer to sell it to his brother living in the states, whose son Adam (Jon Hamm) is actually interested in purchasing the prime property. In fact, Adam is so interested in becoming a “gentleman farmer” that he travels there for a “look-see”. And he likes what he sees in the lovely Rosemary. Yes, it’s a classic romantic triangle. Will the American “interloper” finally spur the eternally hesitant Anthony into action or will the “yank” eventually merge the two farms?

The international cast does their best to “jump-start” this fractured fable. The always interesting Blunt is able to bring a sense of reality to the “passion prize” Rosemary. In her eyes we see a bit of her frustration over the “cards she’s been dealt” and an unrequited passion, not only for Anthony but for experiencing the world that her dusty ole’ records have only hinted about. Blunt does most of the dramatic “heavy lifting” in the amorous encounters with the somewhat dim Anthony. Dornan seems happy to step out of the shadows (and shackles) of Mr. Grey but has to summon all his skills to make the always distracted farmer someone that we can “root” for. It doesn’t help that the role is overwhelmed in the domestic discussions by the charming but miscast Walken, whose accent is right out of a regional dinner theatre production of “Finian’s Rainbow”. He seems to be a “special guest star” in a Dublin-based TV sitcom. The same could be said of Hamm, though mercifully spared a brogue, who is the usual abrasive, arrogant ugly American that’s so popular in many such foreign flicks and TV shows. For most of his scenes, Hamm leans hard on a bemused but often confused reaction to the eccentric townsfolk. It’s hard to accept that his Adam would want to do a whole “Green Acres” life change.

Lauded playwright John Patrick Shanley directs this adaptation of his stage work, which doesn’t have that “let’s open this up for cinema” look as many theatre-based films. Maybe the original venue softened the air of forced whimsy that pervades the take. This seems to be intended for folks who thought that THE QUIET MAN was a brutal, realistic “slice of life”.  So much of this is cringe-worthy “cutesy-ness” passing for wit (Blunt retains her dignity even as she must perform “Swan Lake” moves on a gravel driveway). There’s the beginning of a “spark” between Adam and Rosemary, but zero chemistry with her longtime intended. Then Anthony’s big reveal of the secret that pushed him away from her is indulgently ridiculous. Yes, the flora and fauna are spectacular, but enduring this tripe feels like being bopped on your noggin by the “blarney stone” after a meal of rancid corned beef. After 100 or so minutes of this drivel, the final scene has a big singing curtain call with the deceased characters smiling from a prime pub table (that’s because they weren’t watching or streaming this). WILD MOUNTAIN THYME is far from “time” well spent. I’d rather douse a bowl of Lucky Charms with Guinness.

1 Out of 4

WILD MOUNTAIN THYME screens exclusively in the St. Louis area at Landmark’s Plaza Frontenac and in select theatres everywhere. It’s also available as a video on demand via multiple streaming apps and platforms.