UNCLE DREW – Review

So, this Summer a popular kids’ game has made it to the big screen: TAG, though the R-rated comedy isn’t for the smaller set. Well, why not release a flick about a real sport, one that the kiddos love, say basketball? Yes, it’s the subject of comedies and dramas, from HOOSIERS to WHITE MEN CAN”T JUMP to SEMI-PRO. But here’s something that sets this new flick apart. It’s a big screen adaptation, but not from a comic strip, comic book, novel, or TV show. Hmmm, it does have its roots on the tube, though it’s an expansion of a popular commercial campaign. Kind of like that 90’s cult classic, SPACE JAM. We’re not talking shoes this time, the ads (that date back six years) hawked a soft drink, Pepsi Max. Sure those spots are fun, but will movie audiences want to spend more than 60 seconds (103 minutes to be precise) watching the “slam-dunk” wizardry of UNCLE DREW?

The film’s first few minutes open with the history of the title character in a faux “30 by 30” ESPN mini-doc with lots of famous talking heads recalling his exploits, which led to the controversial first Rucker Classic street ball tournament fifty years ago. Jump (shot) to today as the big 2018 Ruckers celebration edition nears. we meet Dax (Lil Rrl Howery), who has loved the game all his life (though he says the game hasn’t loved him back). He’s sunk his meager life savings, amassed working at the local mall’s Foot Locker, into coaching a team to win the big 100 grand prize money. There’s lots of pressure, particularly form Dax’s “material” girlfriend Jess (Tiffany Haddish), who has big plans for the cash. As does Dax’s rival, Mookie (Nick Kroll), who plots to coach his own winning team. His true colors are revealed when he poaches Dax’s team. Desperate to recruit new players, Dax learns of the legend of Uncle Drew. Dax soon finds out the legend is no tall tale when he witnesses the geriatric hustler (Kyrie Irving) take down a boastful, much younger player. After the pick-up game Dax pleads with Drew to be part of his team. Drew agrees, with the stipulation that he fills the roster with his old crew. Thus begins the quest, as Drew and Dax travel the country in an old beaten-up van. First up, there’s “Preacher” (Chris Webber), now a real pastor who’s under the thumb of wife Betty Lou (Lisa Leslie). In an assisted living facility they pick up visually-impaired “Lights” (Reggie Miller) and wheelchair-bound “Boots” (Nate Robinson), along with his lovely granddaughter Maya (Erica Ash). The real challenge is convincing “Big Fella” ( Shaquille O’Neal) to leave his martial arts school and set aside old grudges. Even with his old squad, can Uncle Drew bring victory to the underdog Dax, and maybe reignite his old passion for the game?

Mr. Howery is a talented, funny fellow, we know that from his scene-stealing supporting turn in GET OUT. Unfortunately his lead (though not in the title) role is not nearly as interesting as the TSA BFF. Dax is far too needy and “whiny”, a doormat for everyone, and later a straight man for Drew and crew. You deserve much better material Mr. H, though you commit with lots of manic energy. In the same vein, this is a bit of a letdown after Ms. Haddish’s break-out work in last Summer’s GIRLS TRIP. Jess is a one-note “gold-digger” who exists only to give Dax more “agita” and anxiety. She works hard, but the script fails her, making her repeat “Remember ‘dat?” almost like a mantra in the final end credit farewell. Things don’t go much better for the film’s “good girl” Maya, a constricting “straight” sister that never allows Ms. Ash a chance to cut loose (a shame since she’s a “MadTV” vet). Kroll is able to wring some laughs as the obnoxious villain, but the playground taunts and teases seem a waste of his considerable comic skills, now on great display in the Netflix version of his hit Broadway show “Oh, Hello” (not to mention his terrific recent dramatic turn in LOVING). Mookie’s really a flashy baboon (and buffoon). As for the “hoops stars” none of them really seem destined for future screen stardom (that includes movie vet Shaq), though Webber has some high-spirited fun as the  bouncing “baby-baptizing” holy man.

The tepid script from Jay Longino is barely given any energy from director Charles Stone III, though they may have been too obligated to replicate the format of the commercials (and yes, Pepsi is one of the producers making certain there are lots of “product placement”). Gags that worked so well in the classic COCOON are hammered and milked to exhaustion. We’re well aware that these young guys are capable of amazing court prowess. In part, that’s due to the ludicrous “old age” makeup. I can imagine how the late great makeup genius Dick Smith (LITTLE BIG MAN) would’ve reacted to the clumsy grey wigs and crude drawn wrinkle lines. And we get the “senior citizen” cliches repeated over and over. No matter the outside temps, Drew must crank up the heater. And they have to “go” all the time. Hysterical! Perhaps that’s a way to stretch the road trip (including a useless dance club challenge) before the “big final game”. Even that’s hampered by a cloying attempt at pathos (talking to a headstone at a cemetery…really). Hard core hoops fans may enjoy the “trash talk” and sweet “no net” scores. For the rest of us, well, here’s hoping that UNCLE DREW hangs up that smelly old track suit for good. Hit the showers!

1.5 Out of 5