MY BIG FAT GREEK WEDDING 2 – Review

Okay film fans, are you all set for the big sequel storming the multiplex this weekend. No, not that one, the one with the caped combatants. Instead of spandex think….Windex. This is the follow-up that most movie-goers of a…ahem…certain age have been clamoring for since the original shocked and stunned Hollywood fourteen (gasp!) years ago. That’s because this lil’ flick with no big marquee stars, which cost a paltry five million, went on to gross just under a quarter of a billion bucks. So what took em’ so long, you may ask. Well, there was a TV show in 2003 that CBS canned after just seven episodes. Tis’ a distant memory, one that will be erased when the whole gang is back for MY BIG FAT GREEK WEDDING 2. So pass the ouzo! Opa!

Once again, good ole’ Gus Portokalos (Michael Constantine) is driving off to open his Chicago diner Dancing Zorba’s along with his daughter Toula (Nia Vardalos). Whoa, wasn’t she working at a travel agency? Well, how do you book your trips, Mr. Shatner? Oh, and Gus is also giving a lift to Toula’s eighteen year-old daughter Paris (Elena Kampouris) who is attending the high school where her father Ian (John Corbett) is now principle after many years as a teacher. She’s squeezed in the back seat along with many grandchildren. Paris is mulling over several college choices (Toula’s rooting for nearby Northwestern) and hopes that dreamy Bennett (Alex Wolf) will be her prom date. Meanwhile Gus decides to research his family’s roots online (he must be a direct descendant of Alexander the Great!). In going through old mementos, Gus looks over his wedding license. Hmm, it’s not signed by the priest of his native Greek village. Turns out he was not fully ordained and could not legally perform nuptials. He and Maria (Lainie Kazan) have been “shacking up” all these years. He pleads for a quick city hall trip, but Maria wants the wedding she never had, the wedding of her dreams. And with the help of forceful, fiesty Aunt Voula (Andrea Martin), along with the whole Portokalos kin, Maria will get her wish, despite the chaos and consternation.

So, how has the fam’ changed? Well aside from a few grey hairs, not a whole lot, although some, ahem, nips and tucks have left a few cast members with frozen faces (makes it tough to ID their expressions…really tough!). Let’s go down the list. Vardalos’s Toula is still clumsy and gets exasperated quickly when she seems to be the lone voice of reason. Of course, she’s still making “goo-goo” eyes at Ian, still played with laid back charm by Corbett. Ian stands up for himself, but is too often the straight man (well, straight dude). Kazan is still the ultimate ethnic Earth mother, Constantine’s a stubborn irascible geezer goof-ball, and Martin is the brassy, sassy queen of TMI, rattling off ulta-intimate details of her interior to anyone within earshot. The big new edition here is Kampouris, who survives her underwritten cliché’ “surly teen” part (how many times can she scream “Mom!!”?) despite the confusion over her makeup and wardrobe (is there such a thing as “goth/grunge”?). Other “newbies” are producer Rita Wilson and TV hunk John Stamos in a couple of scenes that seem to slow up the story. They escape unscathed compared to the dull, drippy role (college recruiter) foisted on comedy commando Rob Riggle in a painful cameo. I so hoped he’s break free of that scripted muzzle and stir up some, huh, stuff. Nah.

Kirk Jones takes the directing reins from Joel Zwick and tries to keep the film’s tempo flowing. Ultimately he’s hampered by the episodic nature of the script by star Vardalos. Actually it often feels like several episodes of the failed TV show hastily cut and pasted into a feature (“Gus tracks his family tree”, “Paris goes to the Prom”, etc.). Fans of the first flick should be satisfied as it’s another rehashing of the main themes of the original (aren’t these eccentric, non-threatening “ferriners” just soooo adorable?). And it is more easy to tolerate than other studios’ stabs at the big “family comedy” (I’m looking at you again LOVE THE COOPERS). It’s safe and inoffensive, perfect for a matinée with the relatives. But watching MY BIG FAT GREEK WEDDING is like devouring a big five-pound pan of Baklava in one setting. It’s sweet and warm and the first few bites go down smoothly. But after 90 minutes you’ll be left with is regret and a sugar-induced migraine. No-pa!

1.5 Out of 5