LAST VEGAS – The Review

Michael Douglas, Robert DeNiro, Kevin Kline and Morgan Freeman, who appear to be in their 60s (because they are – except Freeman who’s 77), have the mind-sets of Grandpa Simpson in the new comedy LAST VEGAS, embarrassing not one but four Oscar-winning actors too young to play old fogies (Kline is just 65) and too old to be making such fools of themselves in front of the camera. LAST VEGAS, a comedy about geriatric pals on a Las Vegas bender has nothing new to say about geriatrics or about Vegas. The four childhood pals are gathered in Sin City so millionaire Billy (Douglas ), the one hold-out bachelor of the group, can celebrate before he’s to wed a much younger woman (Bre Blair). Paddy (De Niro) is recently widowed, unable to get over the death of his wife and his life-long rivalry with Billy. Archie (Freeman), recovering from a stroke, is treated like a child by his over-protective son. Sam (Kline) is happily married to Joanna Gleason who gives him a condom so he can have some fun on the trip. There’s not much more to the plot. Freeman quickly wins a mint at the craps table so the four can throw a huge bachelor party. They also judge a bikini contest, fight some younger guys, and pose as gangsters to intimidate a young tough (Jerry Ferrara) into being their servant. The conflict between Paddy and Billy is renewed when they both fall for a sultry torch singer (Mary Steenbergen).

LAST VEGAS is sitcom-level stuff that tries to skate by on the charisma and camaraderie of this quartet of legendary actors, but even they can only take it so far with a weak script mostly made up out of spare parts from other movies. THE HANGOVER meets GRUMPY OLD MEN was the obvious pitch, but LAST VEGAS is all contrived gimmick, and we don’t believe a minute of it. This geriatric group and their colorful fellow travelers come up with a couple of nice laughs and a funny scene or two (great shot of Freeman escaping from a first floor window of his son’s home), but too often the jokes themselves are nearly dead. Dressed in clichéd Florida geezer wear, each man’s shtick swells into a frenzy of overacting in the name of aging that should have died with The Golden Girls.

I suppose LAST VEGAS is mildly amusing as long as you keep your expectations low and it may be the kind of movie older audiences are searching for. It’s cheerful, it’s well under two hours, and it doesn’t address any major social issues, unless you think Michael Douglas marrying a woman young enough to be his daughter is cause for alarm. Director John Tureltaub keeps his amiable Disney-like comedy mostly wholesome without resorting to HANGOVER-inspired vulgarity, which is great unless you were hoping for some HANGOVER-inspired vulgarity. It occasionally deals with getting older in a sensitive way, especially the straight way DeNiro plays his character, but LAST VEGAS is too pat to really be convincing, and the progress of Steenbergen’s relationships with two of the stars seems dictated mostly by the needs of the screenplay. But these vets are fun to see together, if for no other reason than just for the essence of their beings. And in a year where all of the other movies seem to specialize in varieties of doom and gloom, their beloved old faces are the sunniest sight around. If you’re looking for something safe to take your elderly parents (or grandparents) to, LAST VEGAS should fit the bill, but it’s a forgettable film.

2 of 5 Stars