Top 10 Tuesday – Ass Kickers And Gravity Doctors: Who’s Who in Jeff Wadlow’s KICK-ASS 2?

By Movie Geeks | August 13, 2013

With Jeff Wadlow’s action-comedy set to open this Friday, Kick-Ass, Hit Girl and Red Mist return for the follow-up to 2010’s irreverent global hit KICK-ASS 2.

After Kick-Ass’ (Aaron Taylor-Johnson) do-it-yourself vigilante bravery inspires a new wave of self-made masked crusaders, led by the badass Colonel Stars and Stripes (Jim Carrey), our hero joins them on patrol. When these amateur superheroes are hunted down by Red Mist (Christopher Mintz-Plasse) – reborn as the super-villain The Motherf%&*^r – only the blade-wielding Hit Girl (Chloë Grace Moretz) can prevent their annihilation.

When we last saw junior assassin Hit Girl and young masked hero Kick-Ass, they were trying to live as normal teenagers Mindy and Dave. With graduation looming and uncertain what to do with their shared calling, Dave decides to start the world’s first superhero team with Mindy.

Unfortunately, when Mindy is busted for sneaking out as Hit Girl, she’s forced to retire – leaving her to navigate the terrifying world of high-school mean girls on her own. With no one left to turn to, Dave joins forces with Justice Forever, run by a born-again ex-mobster named Colonel Stars and Stripes.

Just as they start to make a real difference on the streets, a new self-proclaimed super-villain, The Motherf%&*^r, assembles his own evil league and puts a plan in motion to make Kick-Ass and Hit Girl pay for what they did to his dad. But there’s only one problem with his scheme: If you mess with one member of Justice Forever, you mess with them all.

Considering the number of characters trying to either save or destroy the fair metropolis, WAMG is going to walk you through who does what to whom. Below is our Top 10 list on the brave superheroes and nasty super-villains who populate this world. They’re good, bad and/or ugly, but don’t underestimate these formerly ordinary folks who just want to kick some ass.

Kick-Ass and Hit Girl’s Inner Circle

1. Dave Lizewski/Kick-Ass:

Dave/Kick-Ass (Aaron Taylor-Johnson) is a New York teenage vigilante whose bravery inspired a new wave of self-made masked crusaders. With graduation looming and uncertain of his future plans, Dave decides to start t e world’s first superhero team with Mindy, aka Hit Girl. When Mindy is busted for sneaking out as Hit Girl, Dave joins forces with Justice Forever, run by a born-again ex-mobster who calls himself Colonel Stars and Stripes.

2. Mindy Macready/Hit Girl:

A 14-year-old, blade-wielding, nunchaku-skilled force of nature, Mindy/Hit Girl (Chloë Grace Moretz) is going through the awkward stages of freshman year. Highly trained and heavily armed by her late father, Big Daddy, she still can’t escape the snide comments from the popular girls in her class. She’d rather kick some thug’s ass than face high school, so she sneaks out as soon as her guardian drops her off.

3. Marcus Williams:

After Mindy’s father’s death at the hands of Frank D’Amico, Big Daddy’s old partner, Marcus Williams (Morris Chestnut), became her guardian. Marcus drops Mindy off at high school every day, but as soon as he leaves, so does she. He made Mindy promise she’d give up her extracurricular activities as Hit Girl, though he fears he’ll find katana blades under her bed every time he looks.

4. Marty/Battle Guy and Todd/Ass Kicker:

Marty and Todd are Dave’s comic-book collecting best friends. Though Marty (Clark Duke) plans to be premed at college, he has secretly developed a superhero persona named Battle Guy. Inspired by Kick-Ass, he excitedly joins Justice Forever. Todd’s future plans are up in the air, though he currently plans to attend a safety school in Florida to study golf course management. Wanting to be a part of something important, Todd/Ass Kicker (Augustus Prew) is eager to join any team that will have him.

5. Katie Deauxma:

Dave’s super-cute girlfriend, Katie (Lyndsy Fonseca), is super-excited to get her life started. She plans to attend college, and Dave is expecting she’ll dump him as soon as she heads off. The cute couple has started suffering from boredom in the bedroom: She fantasizes about another guy while Dave daydreams about his English teacher.

Justice Forever

6. Sal Bertolini/Colonel Stars and Stripes, Insect Man, Tommy’s Mom and Dad, Night Bitch and Dr. Gravity:

Sal Bertolini/Colonel Stars and Stripes (Jim Carrey) is a morally driven ex-mobster, a leader who is decked out in camouflage and an iconic mask. He patrols the streets with his trusted and masked sidekick, a German shepherd named Eisenhower. The Colonel created Justice Forever to protect people when the system fails, and he hates foul language as much as he hates evil.

Colonel Stars and Stripes leads Justice Forever in a vigilante raid.

One of the more enthusiastic members of Justice Forever, Dr. Gravity (Donald Faison) is a copywriter who pretends he’s a physics professor by day and a super hero by night. His physics “knowledge” comes in handy when he creates a zero-gravity device that can levitate any object up to a ton… but in fact, it’s just a baseball bat covered in tin foil.

A ballet teacher by day, Miranda Swedlow assumed her superhero persona, Night Bitch (Lindy Booth), after her sister was murdered. Although she is helping Justice Forever fight crime, Night Bitch also gets closer to its newest member, Kick-Ass… in every fast-food restaurant bathroom in the city.

Insect Man (Robert Emms) has been bullied his entire life for being gay, so now he’s standing up for the defenseless. Armed with a taser (and an impossibly wealthy knowledge of bugs), Insect Man doesn’t need a mask to make the world a better place.

In the comic series, Tommy’s Dad/Remembering Tommy (Steven Mackintosh) wears a homemade suit of armor, while Tommy’s Mom (Monica Dolan) is dressed like an Amazonian warrior. In our story, they are decked out in T-shirts with the name “Remembering Tommy” to honor their son who vanished without a trace.

**The Motherf%&*^r’s Super-Villains**

7. Chris D’Amico/Red Mist/The Motherf%&*^r:

The spoiled son of deceased crime boss Frank D’Amico, Chris D’Amico/Red Mist/The Motherf%&*^r (Christopher Mintz-Plasse) has grown obsessed with taking revenge on Kick-Ass, who blew up Frank with a bazooka. After Chris’ mother’s (YANCY BUTLER) untimely death, Red Mist – freshly dressed in her old fetish gear and cape – is reborn as The Motherf%&*^r . So begins the richest kid in New York City’s quest to become the world’s first real super-villain.

8. Javier:

Javier (John Leguizamo) is Chris’ bodyguard, and he’s reluctant to call his employer by an upgraded super-villain name (he had a hard enough time calling him Red Mist). The Alfred to is boss’ evil Bruce Wayne, Javier is tasked with helping The Motherf%&*^r expand his super-villain team. Now that Chris has lost both parents, Javier is the only real family he has left.

9. Katarina Dombrovski/ Mother Russia and Black Death:

The highest-paid member of The Motherf%&*^r’s team, Katarina Dombrovski/ Mother Russia (Olga Kurkulina) is a bodybuilder and former KGB member who can beat anyone to a pulp. She was locked up in the Gulag…until she ate her cellmate and escaped. Black Death (Daniel Kaluuya), of course named as such by The Motherf%&*^r , met Chris at an MMA gym, where e promptly kicked Chris’ ass to the mat. Impressed, Chris hired Black Death to beat up anyone on his hit list.

10. Genghis Carnage and Big Tony/The Tumor:

Chris insists that his underling’s names aren’t racial stereotypes, they’re archetypes. Genghis Carnage (Tom Wu) is a former Chinese gangster looking for a new boss. The Motherf%&*^r hires him to do his heavy lifting and heavier attacking. Big Tony/The Tumor (Andy Nyman) is reminiscent of one of our favorite Goodfellas… all 5 feet 2 inches of him. Although this psychotic killer may be small, he’s mean as hell and will stab you with a pool cue if you look at him funny.

From a screenplay by director Jeff Wadlow (Cry-Wolf, Never Back Down) and based on the comic book created by Mark Millar (Wanted, Kick-Ass) & John S. Romita Jr. (Kick-Ass), the action-comedy is produced by Matthew Vaughn (X-Men: First Class, Kick-Ass), Adam Bohling (Kick-Ass, Layer Cake), Tarquin Pack (X-Men: First Class, Kick-Ass) and David Reid (Kick-Ass, Layer Cake).