Top Ten Tuesday: Evil Machines

Since ‘Terminator: Salvation’ is coming out Friday we decided to do a Top Ten Evil Machines list. We scoured everyone’s opinions and this is what we got. Even though there are a lot more evil machines out there, these are the ones we thought were the worst and definitely most evil bastards to ever grace the silver screen.

Enjoy the list and we look forward to the ones you think you need to dispute on the list or off.

10. Megatron

Megatron is the evil leader of the Decepticons who is responsible for destroying the Autobots home world Cybertron. Megatron was trying to obtain All Spark(Cube that controls the “life” of all Transformers) which he found on earth. Megatron’s only mission is to obtain the All Spark and destroy all the Autobots and rule the world. He is ruthless and doesn’t care who or what he destroys on his mission.

Megatron is so evil that customs often times seized these toys when they come through the mail, airports, and any other way they can be transported because the “gun form” of the first series Megatron toy looks exactly like a real gun. You can see it here, which also makes Megatron an evil asshole!

09. Gort

Although the special effects weren’t amazing, the original ‘The Day the Earth Stood Still’ will still give you chills. Gort was the evil bastard machine who accompanies Klaatu on his mission to warn the inhabitants of Earth of their impending doom because of their atomic weapon development. Gort uses a laser that shoots from underneath his visor to “vaporize” anything he feels as a threat. Although he is there on a peace keep mission he is still an evil force to be reckoned with.

08. The Borg

Who doesn’t remember the tagline “Resistance is futile”?   With that, the Borg dominated the Star Trek universe for years, becoming one of the most popular villains in the television/film franchise.   With extreme strength and an intense ability to adapt to any situation, the Borg can assimilate a whole Starfleet crew before Data can calculate the likelihood of survival.   I’ll give you a hint.   It’s not very good.   The notion of the Borg Queen in ‘Star Trek: First Contact’ kind of ruined the whole idea of the “collective,” but that didn’t make them any less scary.

07. The Gunslinger

I remember seeing ‘Westworld’ when I was still fairly young and Yul Brynner’s portrayal of The Gunslinger scared the bejesus out of me. The Gunslinger was a robot in a hi-tech wild west attraction that short-circuits and begins hunting down and killing everyone trapped within the attraction. It’s an emotionless, cold and relentless pursuer that stalks it’s victims with the familiar tension of Michael from ‘Halloween’… slow and patient. The character becomes even more frightening when The Gunslinger’s face is detached, revealing his true robotic self underneath as he continues to pursue innocent people with deadly robotic accuracy.

06. T-800

Arnold Schwarzenegger’s character is classified(in most cases) as a T-800 or Terminator in the ‘Terminator’ movies. The T-800 is a programmable cyborg designed by SkyNet who has the ultimate goal of eliminating the human race. They have flesh and blood and walk, talk and by most standards are exactly like humans. When they are wounded or shot their endoskeleton becomes visible. The T-800 is almost indestructible, unless of course you eliminate it in a hydraulic press.

The original goal was to go back into time in order to eliminate Sarah Connor, the mother of John Connor who eventually comes to be the leader of the Human Resistance.

05. Darth Vader

“He’s more machine now than man.” – Obi-Wan Kenobi, ‘Star Wars’

The only reason Darth Vader isn’t at the tippy top of this list of evil machines is because of his redemption in the face of his snotty, teen-aged son.   That, and the fact that Hayden Christensen didn’t do the character any damn favors.   Despite all that, Vader still remains one of the most iconic and evil machine-based characters in cinema history.   With the power of the Force at his beckoning, Vader is able to choke out Grand Moffs from across the room and fly a TIE fighter with the best of them.   We’ll just forget he trained at flying those TIE fighters by racing in pod races as a slave boy.   We’ll try to forget.   It’s hard, you know.

04. Roy Batty

He’s slick, he’s suave, he’s slightly crazy and has nothing to lose. Oh yeah, he’s also ticked off at the human race for creating him as a slave and has vowed himself an enemy of mankind to the final day of his artificial life. Roy Batty looks just like us, except he’s stronger and faster and just as smart. Stay on his good side, or risk ending up on the underside of his boot.

03. T-1000

With a mimetic poly-alloy body, the ability to mimic anyone’s appearance and voice, and the capability of turning its limbs into knives and stabbing weapons, the T-1000 is the sleekest and coolest assassin in the sci-fi universe.   SkyNet really outdid itself when it came up with this one, as the T-1000 is seemingly unstoppable.   Of course, leave it up to an overprotective T-800, an annoyingly, 14-year-old Edward Furlong, and a vat of molten steel to screw up SkyNet’s plans.   Regardless of its destruction, the T-1000 is still the coolest character in the ‘Terminator’ franchise, and it remains one of the most evil characters in all of science fiction.

02. Hal 9000

HAL 9000 was the original, voice-driven, evil computer on a manned space mission, and he has lived up to that role in the decades since ‘2001: A Space Odyssey’ came out.   Voiced by Douglas Rain, who did very little else in his career, HAL had a soothing voice that was basically rubbing your back to find the soft spot to stick the knife.   At one point, HAL sets an astronaut adrift.   While a fellow astronaut goes out to rescue him, HAL locks the both of them outside.   What a prick!   Since its initial release in April ’68, there have been similarly evil, artificial intelligence-driven computers who have turned on their human counterparts.   HAL 9000 was the first and the best of these.

01. The Sentinels

Easily the most formidable, ruthless and darn near indestructible evil machines ever portrayed on film. It takes massive rounds from some pretty heavy freaking artillery just to slow down these massive flying squid-like baddies with the spider-eyes and deadly tentacles. They’re fast, agile, smart, adaptive and on top of everything else, they travel/hunt in packs. The Sentinals are the ultimate killing machines!