Review: ‘The Pink Panther 2’

Ram Man:

Three years ago the powers that be decided to resurrect the greatest detective in the world (in his opinion)   Lt. Jacques Clouseau. Steve Martin was cast as the bumbling, stumbling Detective made famous by the late great Peter Sellers.   The problem was they didn’t stick to the original, they left out funny gags that were staples with Sellers in the Pink Panther movies. Instead they popped in Beyonce and it was a pop singer with a crime happening. So when I heard there was a sequel coming down the pipe, I became nauseated. Everyone is back from the original except the diva (Beyonce). They have added some A-list supporting actors: Andy Garcia,  Alfred Molina and the lovely Aishwarya Rai (Bollywood hottie).

This time around, Clouseau (Martin) has been relegated to parking meters to avoid destroying Paris. A master criminal called “The Tornado” has come out of hiding and stolen priceless artifacts from around the globe. The Shroud of Turin, The Magna Carta, The Pope’s ring and The Imperial sword of Japan all are missing. The Countries of the world decide to gather together their finest detectives, a dream team of law enforcement, and Paris must send Lt. Jacques Clouseau. Clouseau is apprehensive about leaving France for fear the country’s prize possession, The Pink Panther Diamond, may be stolen next. As soon as Clouseau passes the custom sign that reads “You Are Now Leaving France” a news flash hits the airport terminal… “The Pink Panther Diamond has been stolen by the Tornado”. Clouseau simply responds, “See I Tell You!”

So now the so-called Dream Team Detectives: Vincenzo (Garcia) from Italy, Cyber wiz Kenji (Yuki Matsuzaki) from Tokyo and Inspector Pepperidge (Molina) from London all convene in Paris to be led by Clouseau and his partners Ponton (Jean Reno) & Nicole (Emily Mortimer). There is also a gemologist Sonia (Rai) on the team. After a humorous introduction the group determines that the Pink Panther is the real lead because it is the only item that can be fenced. During the investigation Ponton is booted from his house and comes to live with Clouseau dragging along his two boys. This allows Martin and the crew to reprise one of the classic Clouseau bits from the old films “The Sneak Attack”. Upon entering his home Clouseau must be on alert for Ponton’s kids, karate experts, that protect the house and keep the inspector on his toes.

This is the Pink Panther so expect the typical language problem with Clouseau’s french accent, and the normal bumbling style of detective work made famous by the character. Pink Panther 2 is a  European investigation of laughs that will have you chuckling from France to Rome. Clouseau even dons the Pope’s robes and falls out the Vatican window! That will drop a nun or two. It’s fine for the entire family. The only thing that is still missing is the hat and trench coat that Seller’s made famous as Jacques Clouseau.

I am not going to give you all the details and unlike trailers these days all the jokes either. I’m just going to recommend you go see, Yes I said “Go See” the Pink Panther 2. It took 3 years, 2 attempts and the firing of a diva, but they finally got the formula right. In no way is it better than the original, but it is a valiant effort and has enough laughs to be worth your matinee dollars. Before I forget to mention and lose my Monty Python Fan club card, John Cleese is great as  Chief Inspector Dryfus, Clouseau’s boss. They even have the original music and animation the brings back all of the funny Panther memories.

[Overall: 3 stars out of 5]

Jeremy:

I remember liking the original ‘Pink Panther’. Â  Not the one by Blake Edwards. Â  Everyone likes that. Â  I’m talking about the original, Steve Martin-led ‘Pink Panther’. Â  I tell myself whenever I think about the film that I enjoyed it. Â  However, I can’t remember much of anything outside the “‘amburger” scene. Â  It didn’t take me long to forget about most of the film. Â  Well, I can tell you, if you plan on seeing ‘Pink Panther 2’, no need for an ‘Eternal of the Spotless Mind’-style memory wipe. Â  It’s already here.

‘Pink Panther 2’ is a comedy whose jokes and humor falls flat at pretty much every turn. Â  It is a completely forgettable entry into a wholly forgettable franchise.

Of course, Martin returns as Inspector Jacques Clouseau, the bumbling, French detective who always seems to get his man. Â  Jean Reno, for reasons I can’t fathom, returns as Ponton, Clouseau’s partner, and Emily Mortimer returns as Nicole, Clouseau’s “secret” girlfriend.

This time around, Clouseau is heading a “Dream Team” of investigators who are charged with getting to the bottom of the case of The Tornado. Â  The Tornado is a thief who has stollen a number of priceless artifacts, including the Shroud of Turin, the Magna Carta, and the famed Pink Panther diamond. Â  If you know anything about this series, you know Clouseau bumbles his way to solving the case in the most idiotic manners possible.

This isn’t to say ‘Pink Panther 2’ is completely devoid of humor. Â  There are a handful of genuinely funny moments. Â  Most of them involve Andy Garcia as the suave and arrogant Italian detective on the team or Lily Tomlin as a sesitivity trainer who comes in to keep Clouseau from ogling at beautiful women or being overall racist towards Asian people. Â  Those scenes are funny in the way ‘Gran Torino’s Walt Kowalski is funny, and he and Clouseau probably would have enjoyed a beer or two together if Kowalski could keep from calling the detective a “smelly frog”. Â  They even find a way, crowbarred as it may be, of reprising the old “‘amburger” gag from the first film.

Unfortunately, even those funnier moments in the film are lost amidst the ocean of lame sight gags and pratfalls. Â  Sure, kids will love seeing people getting thrown down flights of stairs or get thrown from cars and get launched literally hundreds of feet into the air. Â  It falls too many times into the “Trip-Yawn-Repeat” humor that has become the staple to so many otherwise forgetttable comedies such as this.

Nothing should be said about the actual plot of the film. Â  It is so predictable who The Tornado is that it probably should have just been revealed to us from frame one. Â  At least then the film wouldn’t have given the impression of being a mystery. Â  But you can’t really fault this kind of family comedy for its irregular and unconvincing plot points.

A note: I don’t know what this says for the film, but you can’t help but notice they use the exact same shot of the Eiffel Tower and the Seine River at least five times. Â  No exaggeration. Â  The exact same shot. Â  I guess you could say the rest of the film wasn’t interesting enough to draw your attention away from that fact. Â  It’s a distraction, nonetheless.

You probably won’t see ‘Pink Panther 2’ on anyone’s “best” or “worst” lists at the end of the year. Â  It is simply a forgettable comedy, harmless as it may be, that doesn’t offer much of anything new to its genre. Â  I’m sure when the inevitable ‘Pink Panther 3’ comes out, I will look back fondly on this film, and I may have even convinced myself by then that I enjoyed it. Â  However, it is now 12 hours since seeing it, and I am struggling to remember it even now.

One last “‘amburger” for the road.

[Overall: 2.5 stars out of 5]